at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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