Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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