Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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