Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
