ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
