Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
