Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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