I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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