How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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