who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So I just went to clothing optional bar
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
