whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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