She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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