Jerry, you need to find god
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
