im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
