how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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