i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
