I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
