you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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