He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
