let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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