that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
