what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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