HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
