My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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