No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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