I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
