If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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