how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
did i just pee glitter
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
