Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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