Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
