so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
