i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I don't think brook has ever known best
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
