So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize