so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
