I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
