Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
