I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize