with your own penis?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
