The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
