like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Someone came in the potted fern
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
