The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
