She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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