youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
