u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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