Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I checked into jail on foursquare
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
