its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
