your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
