oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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