White coat. Heels.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Randomize
