Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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